Saturday, January 31, 2009

Judge Daddy

Hubby wrote this after a classic juvenile difference of opinion.

Court Docket: 20090112AK

Judge: Honorable Daddy-O

Plaintiff: Baby J

Defendant: Kiddo D

Complaint: Baby J charges that Kiddo D willfully and with malice obtained property (toy) owned by Baby J, and refused to return the property once discovered.

Counter-suit: Kiddo D acknowledges that the property belongs to Baby J but claims rights to temporary possession based on the fact that he had it first.

Court called to Order:

The Plaintiff's case: Upon arriving at the living room, the plaintiff observed Kiddo D with the property which was specifically given to him by Momma A. When he contacted Kiddo D, the defendant became agitated and refused to relinquish possession. A verbal altercation ensued as a result. The plaintiff provides proof of ownership, and requests the immediate return of the property. The plaintiff would like criminal charges filed, and the defendant remanded into custody.

The Defendant: The defendant counters that he obtained the property when the plaintiff left it unattended. He knew the property was the plaintiff's, but cites the Family Sharing Act of 2003.

Family Sharing Act of 2003

22 FSA 03, Subpart A: Any item belonging to a person under 16 in the same household shall be shared with other minors in said dwelling with exception to any item that has been owned less than 72 hours as per 23 FSA 03, subpart B.

22 FSA 03, Subpart B: Any item owned by a member under the same household for less than 72 hours shall be the exclusive property of the owner until the time limitation is reached. Any possession by another person during this time shall be treated as possession of stolen property.

The defendant maintains that under this act, the jurisdiction of the property therefore is covered by the Who Had it First Act of 2006.

Who Had it First Act of 2006

32 FSA 06, Subpart A: Any item not covered by 23 FSA 03, Subpart B, shall be determined like common property and stored as such. Possession of items covered in this act shall be temporarily the property of the person that first possesses the item.

32 FSA 06, Subpart B: “Temporary possession” in subpart A shall be defined as a reasonable amount of time as determined by an adult resident, or when the person is done with the item in question; whichever comes first.

The defendant also refutes the plaintiff's testimony that the altercation remained verbal. The defendant maintains that the plaintiff attempted repossession by violent means. The defendant testifies that he was forced to flee the scene with the item. The defendant requests the judge find in favor of his rights under 32 FSA. The defendant also would like criminal charges filed, and the plaintiff remanded into custody.

The Decision:

By the authority granted to me by paternal law, I do hereby find the following:

The plaintiff has sufficiently proven ownership of the item, but has failed to know and recognize the laws of fair play governed by 22 FSA 03 and 32 FSA 06. I hereby find for the defendant based on these laws and the precedent set by previous cases. I order the defendant to return the item by the end of the day as per the guidelines under 32 FSA 06.

Court Adjourned.

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